The (More Than) Complete Cast of CVRPG
Heroes, Villains, Low-lives, and Agents of Leisure
Although most of the time hero stories start with a statement that "the child was known from an early age to be very special", Samus was just a kid. A girl on a mining planet, minding her own business, until one day the planet was attacked by Space Pirates. As the name would imply, Space Pirates were very bad guys, genetically engineered creatures designed to raid and kill. They did both these things to Samus's home planet, killing her parents, her friends, her neighbors, and everyone else. Everyone.
That would be the end of the story right there -- whod expect a young kind to survive on their own alone on a planet? But Samus was saved by a race of bird-like aliens: the Chozo. They took the child in, took her to their home planet, Zebes, and trained her in their ways (which included a whole lot of kicking as with fancy weapons). When she was grown up they gave her a set of Power Armor and sent her to find her way. Samus was free to make her own life.
Of course, when you're raised by giant bird creatures who seem to specialize in weapons and martial arts, the only pace you're going to find a life is in the military (well, or living with a bunch of mutant turtles in the sewers). But military life wasn't for Samus -- she's not much of a joiner -- so after a few months spent listening to other people's commands she went off on her own. She chose the life of a bounty hunter, a job where she could fight for justice (and maybe a bit of revenge on the Space Pirates) but do it on her terms.
Speaking of the Space Pirates, though, their part of the story wasn't over yet. While Samus was off working as a Bounty Hunter, her new home was attacked by Space Pirates (because they're always looking for screw with her). She had to go back and defeat the Space Pirate threat (not that she wasn't up for it anyway) since they'd corrupter her new home and killed her adopted family.
And then, after that, she had to do it again. And again. And again. A bounty hunter's job is never done.
Stoic to a fault, Samus doesn't really talk much. Sure, she knows how, and she's fully capable of holding a conversation. But most of the time Samus is strong and silent, letting her guns handle the "conversating".
But she is really, really good with those guns. While her basic shot is powerful enough, Samus has learned how to equip and adapt various beams to her guns, altering and enhancing her cannon with glorious new powers.
Of course, in a pinch, Samus can also rely on her full arsenal of powers and abilities, from missiles to bombs to super missile to super bombs to ice missiles to... well, let's just say she has a lot of explosives. She's ready for all terrains and all encounters, so don't get on her bad side.
First Appearance: DSWC Heroes Introduction #6: Let's Learn About Metroids
Last Appearance: #3610: Back Pay Revoked
The Red Holiday Alec Prelude
To understand Santa Alec, we first have to go back to how he came into being. You see, long ago there was just one Alec Prelude (well, at least, in this dimension, but that's another story) and the world was a good and just place. However, Alec met up with Link. Well, okay, he met up with Link's corpse (another long story), and Alec looted the body. What?! The treasure was just sitting there! Waste not, want not.
Anywho, among the random tunics and old sock hats that lived in Link's carry-all bag, Alec found a sword. Not just any sword, though -- the Four Sword. With this blade, Alec was able to summon forth three extra copies of himself: Blue, Purple, and Red. Alec then used this blade to fight off the growing advances of Dracula (yet another long story), and the universe was back to being a good and just place.
And then Santa died. Yes, the literal Santa Claus. He was reaped by the Grim Reaper, and that was the end of that jolly old man. Alec (being the innocent soul that he is) realized the world needed a Santa Claus (he'd watched enough Rankin Bass movies to know that) and so he enlisted his Red copy to handle the holidays.
And thus did Santa Alec come into being.
Of the three Holiday Alecs, Red is the most traditional. He's very into the common lore and beliefs of his holiday and sticks to the traditions. That means traveling around on reindeer and fighting with the decorations of the season. His shield is made up to look like a present, his sword is a candy cane, and he has ornaments for bombs. He spreads the tiding and good cheer, and he spreads them violently.
But then, if you really read up on all the lore about Ol' Saint Nick, that man was kind of a monster, too.
The Summer Lady, Personification of Summer
The world is controlled by magic. That may come as a surprise to you, we're sure, since it seems like science runs everything around us. However, that's just because we believe is science, and belief is powered by magic, so in a way science is powered by magic. Mind blowing stuff, right?
Because of magic, many myths and stories are true because people believe (or at least believed) they were true. Monsters are real, gods and devils exist, and there are spirits for all seasons. The most well known of them all is Santa Claus he serves, in a way, as the personification of Winter (and, as we've seen, is really Alec Red). Summer has a personification, too: Sasha, he Summer Lady.
Ruling all of the warm days of the year, the Summer Lady keeps the seasons moving, the Earth warm, and life alive. Without her this world would be a frozen shell of itself, and we really don't think anyone wants that... Well, maybe the Ice Nazis.
As the personification of Summer, Sasha Lady likes it warm. She enjoys temperate to hot days, long walks on sun-drenched beaches, and, ironically, cold glasses of Pina Coladas. She also doesn't tend to wear much (or anything) in the way of clothing.
Really, she's quite popular at parties.
Yo Damn Right
Many creatures are born into evil. What is a foul-smelling, eight headed, bulbous flame beast going to do but take up residence in a cave somewhere and eat passing humans? It's what he was made to do. You can't blame a creature for following basic instincts (or, you can, but you don't do it to its face unless you're well armed and possibly wearing asbestos mail).
Others fall into evil because of the way their lives shifted. Maybe have become despondent over the start of their lives, the future, and the universe and figured "hell, I may as well kill and steal because what does it all mean?" (Of course, for the people they steal from and kill, it meant a lot, they just aren't really able to communicate this point, what with being dead).
Occasionally, though, some just choose the life of evil because they've just got the right skill set for it, and the universe has given them an easy career path to follow. For Shaft, a natural magician with powers leaning toward necromancy and ritual sacrifice, the only obvious career path was as a Priest of the Dark Arts (since politics is so hard to get into, while few people trust a doctor who says "worst comes to worst, those kidneys will certainly look good on my desk... here comes the scalpel").
From an early age, Shaft proved to have a gift with the dead. Of course there was the incident where he resurrected the family dog (what necromancer hasn't done that?). More awkward was the time he accidentally brought their dead grandmother back to life (especially awkward since she'd been dead for five years -- she could still bake a mean lemon cake, though). It was inevitable that Shaft would pursue a life as an evil sorcerer.
Because, really, it's not as if he minded killing people and reanimating them (or their bits) for his sorcery. From a certain perspective, we're all just water and carbon, right?
The thing that makes Shaft a great necromancer is that he just has no consideration for "life". When you can bring anything back from the dead whenever you want, then it's not as if "death" or "life" are terms that really matter anymore. At times Shaft has worked as the local "magic doctor", helping the local masses to turn a buck (and keep a low profile), but Shaft never really felt "among" them -- letting them slowly age and die always seems like a waste of perfectly good materials.
Shaft works to be the best sorcerer in Romania (well, okay, he already thinks he's the best in the world, not just Romania, but he does still work at it). He has a meticulous nature, always working to keep his spells organized, his lab clean, and his spare body parts properly alphabetized. Some would call his need to file and organize everything anal retentive... well, okay, everyone would call it that.
Seriously, for a guy that wades through the guts of corpses, he's a real neat freak.
First Appearance: DSWC Villains Introduction #2: The Villains Plot and Plan
Last Appearance: So You Say...
The Shaft of Earth 2
It's no surprise the Mirror Universe has evil sorcerers. It seems like the Mirror universe was designed as a nexus for evil (which may be why it's so important to the fabric of the multiverse). There's a propensity for evil magic in the world, so evil witches and mages, sorcerers and sorceress are going to naturally occur.
Shaft exists in both universes. Although some people don't occur in both (no one has seen a mirror version of Richter Belmont, for example, although that's probably a good thing), Shaft was bound to appear in both. He's evil, the Mirror Universe is evil, so the two naturally occur together (like an evil version of chocolate and peanut butter).
In the Mirror Universe, though, events didn't play out quite the way Shaft expected. In our world, Shaft trained Katrina and, when her magic got out of hand, cursed her. They went their separate ways, fought occasionally (as heroes vs. villains often do), but the two largely took different paths. In the Mirror Universe, though, Katrina killed Shaft in a fit of rage, stole his powers, and went off to be the most powerful mage in the land.
Since that time, Shaft has been planning his revenge. Stuck in ghostly form, Shaft has been working to slowly rebuild his magic so he can influence the world again. Until that time, though, he can't do much more than haunt those around him, making snide remarks as he watches the world pass him by.
It's just as boring as it sounds.
The Shaft of Earth 2 is consumed by one goal: revenge on the sorcerers who stole his powers. He's not working to try and bring Dracula back, nor his he trying to get into Darkmoon's good graces. No, he just wants petty revenge.
Well, okay, maybe not petty. He does have good reason to want revenge. But considering he's an evil sorcerer who cursed his only student for having a magical accident, it does seem a tad petty, all things considered.
Still, one day he might be the greatest wizard in the land again. it's s slim chance, sure, but it might happen. Maybe...
Although always considered one of the best ninjas (in Asia as well as the rest of the world), Oroku Saki always strived for more. Well, coveted really. Throughout his life what he wanted most was the love and devotion of one woman: Tang Shen. Although Saki loved Shen, she did not reciprocate her feelings, instead falling for another ninja master, Hamato Yoshi. Angry and jealous, Saki eventually struck out at Shen and Yoshi, seemingly killing both of them in a fit of rage.
After this incident, Saki went on to take on a leadership role in the evil ninja clan, The Foot. Fueled by his rage and driven by hate, Saki took the Foot to new levels of evil, using them as his own personal army, controlling the organized crime world throughout Asia.
And yet a separate force worked against Saki when he brought his Foot to America to expand his empire. A rat, human sized and claiming to be Hamato Yoshi (or, at least, his pet rat mutated to human size) appeared, backed by his own warriors -- four turtles named for four renaissance artists, trained in the ways of ninjitsu like their master, Hamato "Splinter" Yoshi. Splinter swore that he would stop Shredder at all costs, gaining his own level of vengeance for the lives lost at Saki's hands.
Shredder faced defeat after defeat from Splinter and the Turtles, but his quest for world domination has never ceased. Whether backed by the Foot, or robots, or mercenaries from Dimension X, one thing has remained constant -- Shredder will one day rule the world or die trying (probably at the hands of Splinter).
Shredder is a half-crazed warrior, skilled in ninjitsu but blinded by rage. He'll seek whatever vengeance he can get against Splinter, not just for their past history but also for all the present indignities he's constantly suffering. His honor, his rage will not allow otherwise.
Curiously while Shredder himself is a madman, he has two clones that cropped up in Romania (during a time-travel incident). This two magically summoned clones are far more sane their this progenitor. While still "evil" technically, they'd much rather spend their days baking pizzas and finding ways to pass the time. One never knows when the magic animating them runs out, and instead of fruitlessly trying to take over the world, the two Shredders much prefer to enjoy what time they have (however long it lasts).
First Appearance: DSWC Villains Introduction #13: The Lustrous Chrome Dome
Last Appearance: #719: Room for Improvement
Throughout the ages there has been a family of hunters. These great warriors have defended the land of Romania from the evils of vampires, werewolves, terrible customer service and poor tippers. These brave vampire hunters were the Belmonts, and most famous of all was Simon.
Sure, growing up Simon had a lot to live up to. He had not one, but three famous ancestors, all of whom had fought, and defeated, Dracula decades and centuries before. But the feared Prince of Darkness (talkin' 'bout Dracula, son) was a tenacious bastard and would come back from the dead, over and over, every hundred years. Simon knew that one day he would have to face off with Dracula (like clockwork), and sure enough, that day did arrive.
Remarkably (considering some of his later descendants -- looking at you, Richter), Simon hadnled himself well, defeating Dracula with a minimum of fuss and just a little bit of muss (does anyone know how to get vampire blood out of armor?). The day was saved and Dracula was sent packing to his grave for... wait, only seven years?
Yes, unbeknownst to Simon, Dracula had set a curse on the vampire hunter (very quickly, in between dying breaths). If Simon was unable to bring the pieces of Dracula's body back together and resurrect the damned bat-head, Simon would die. Obviously, Simon wasn't interested in that outcome.
And so it was that Simon returned to the world of hunting vampires (having retired and opened up a commemorative snow globe shop). He scoured the land, far and wide, to find the five pieces of Dracula (yes, even that piece, you pervs). He then brought the parts together, said a little dark incantation (klatu, verata, necktie), and BOOM! Dracula was reborn. And then killed again, because Simon wasn't having any of that bullshit.
And thus Dracula was sent packing back to his grave for... oh for the love of god! Only one year?! What the hell?! As it turned out, Dracula's first resurrection (eight years ago at this count) was by a dark ritual and, through a loophole, Dracula was still entitled to rise at the 100 year mark. Seriously, that man has the best agent in the business.
By now you know the story. Dracula comes back, and then Simon goes to the vampire's castle. The two fight, and Dracula is defeated. The townspeople rejoice and bury the undead freak (this time under several tons of concrete). And Simon is able to go back to his true love -- creating tiny towns and encasing them in globes of water and glass. Seriously, if you're ever in town, you should check out his shop.
Dracula, wisely, elected to wait on coming back again until after Simon was dead.
Starting out, Simon was unsure of himself. The Belmont name came with a lot of responsibility, and it's hard to live up to that kind of history. He went to Dracula's castle with some trepidation, not knowing if that would be the time Dracula finally had the upper hand and was going to win the day.
However, Simon was the better warrior. And, as the years wore on and he had to fight Dracula again and again (seriously, one time I think they ran into each other at the grocery store and there was a cleanup in aisle three after that encounter), Simon turned into a grizzled old hunter. He knows the drill, he's the best at what he does, and no goddamned bat-head if gonna fuck with him.
Much like another Angel is our series, Sindra started out as an angel riding the grey line between good an evil. Long before humans walk the Earth, Sindra was roaming around, setting fire to whatever she could and basically mucking about with Creation because, well, there wasn't much else to do. Over time, though, she created one to many apocalypses, and God eventually decided to kick her out of Heaven. It was for her own good.
Essentially, Sindra was to walk the Earth, to find a way to be a better person and redeem herself before she'd be allowed back into Heaven. Instead, she met up with Angel (the worst of the angels), and fell even further out of God's good graces. The Devil eventually offered her a job, she had a falling out with Angel (who was still trying to not be absolutely terrible... and failing), and the two went their separate ways.
Centuries later, Sindra met with a different "hero", and undead warrior of time named Link. Link was on the run from Hell (after dying, and then escaping, something the Devil doesn't much like... the escaping, that is), and Sindra was supposed to catch him. However, Link bested the angel, killing her and sending her back to Hell. Out of favor with the Devil, Sindra was desperate to regain her lost powers (since being dead leaves one in a fairly depowered state), so she hatched a new plan: she'd steal the Devil's powers instead.
And, surprise, it worked. Now Sindra is working to be the best Devil the world has ever seen, and that means actually making herself a better person. In the end God was right: Sindra had it in her to be good again, and all she had to to was become the most evil thing in the universe to do it.
As a fallen angel, Sindra doesn't really sweat the details. The ends justify the means is one of those mottoes she whole-heartedly agrees with. If more peaople are saved by some action than the ones that die along the way, it's a win in Sindra's play book. it does help that most of the people that die are going to end up in her domain anyway (Hell), so why worry about the specifics.
Besides, Hell does suit her. She really likes fire, and Hell has almost nothing but. it's like a match made in... well, you know where.
The Purple Holiday Alec Prelude
So by now you're probably aware that there are multiple Alec Preludes. More than just a good version and his evil (Mirror Universe) counterpart, there are other Alecs as well. These guys came into being when Alec held the Four Sword aloft and summons himself some clones. Getting them to appear was easy, but getting them to go back into the sword proved more difficult. The other Alecs (Red, Blue, and Purple) stuck around... probably much longer than they really should have. Eventually the original Alec (Green) found the sword wouldn't accept the other Alecs at all, and all four were permanent.
The other Alecs went off to have a music career (some say with yet another Alec Green, which... try and figure out how that worked)... and then disaster struck. A freak accident at a concert killed all but Alec Purple. The world was reduced by several Alec Preludes, and the music scene was never the same afterwards.
However, Alec Green still had the Four Sword. When Santa Claus died (a different story, for sure), Alec threw caution to the wind and used the blade once again. This summoned forth a new Red, a new Blue, and a second Purple. The original Purple (Purple I) had just gotten in with a band (Righteous Heretics) and really wasn't interested in being involved in some weird Holidays thing, so the new Purple (Purple II) took on the duties of assisting Alec Red II (Santa Alec)... and then Alec Blue II (Chanukah Alec).
It was only a matter of time, then, before they roped him in and made him a full member of the team. Alec Purple II became Solstice Alec and... well, he had every holiday not covered by Santa and Chanukah dumped on him. Sometimes its sucks to be the last person in the party.
Solstice Alec is ostensibly in charge of all the Pagan and Wiccan holidays, but that really doesn't leave a lot out. If it's not Christian and it's not Jewish but it has a holiday around the same time of year, it's, what? Usually just national holidays or some day devoted to one of the lesser gods, goddesses, demons or devils. Solstice Alec doesn't judge -- he's immersed himself in every religion he can, learned all he could, and has devoted himself to delivering presents to ever kid that Santa and Chanukah so rudely ignored.
He is, quite bluntly, busy enough that he could really use some help. Maybe he could get Purple I to come help one day...
Captain of the Sylph
Unlike the heroes we've come to know through the many years of adventuring, Sprockets hails from the future (which is really her present, and ours since we're reading adventures in the future, which really makes our heroes from the past, and thus it's all present when you're talking time travel and my head hurts). As a being of the far-flung future, there are many things she takes for granted that seems strange to us. Space flight is one thing, something our Earth-bound heroes never even thought to look into. And yet Sprockets make her life among the stars.
Although many would consider her a pirate of sorts, stealing parts from wrecks and waste of the cosmos, Sprockets prefers the term "freelancer" (or, at the very least, "scavenger"). By her reasoning the stuff was just going to waste among the stars so she may as well claim it and put it to good use. Making her money. Because she fixes most of it. And resells it. For a tidy profit.
Of course, many private entities (and the main galactic government) tried to recruit her for her skills (and her amazing skip, the Sylph, which is powered by the self-repairing, fully-conscious A.I., Gertie), but Sprockets has remains steadfast in her desire to be free among the stars. A lone wolf living and working and playing in the vast cosmos.
At least until she met our heroes and was stuck ferrying their dumb asses around. Yet another promising young adventurer brought into the weird, wild fold of our bungling do-gooders.
Sprockets loves to work on tech. She's a gearhead and could spend her days learning about new technology, figuring out how it works... and then building it onto her ship to make it better. That's how she gathered the parts to build the Sylph, how she came up with the nano-technology that powers it, and how she devised Gertie to run everything.
Magic, though... that's something else altogether. As a girl of science, Sprockets is still trying to wrap her head around the power (and consequences) of magic and what it really means about the cosmos. For now she's wary, just hoping that magic doesn't explode and kill everyone.
Which it totally could.
Although the succubi and incubi are afamed, fabled race, it's rare to actually see one in the flesh. As being of the dream world, the dream demons (as they're collectively known) spend most of their time floating astrally through the minds of their victims, finding those that are alspee and feeding on their sexual thoughts.
The Succubus (not just a succubus but the Succubus) used to be one among the many, but she found a taste for the physical world. Steping through the etherial plane, she found the joys to be had in feeding on the joys of the bedroom. Lust and sex and sweat and all that good stuff that happens behind closed doors (or in a park, or the back of a Volkswagon if that's your thing) became like a drug to her, and she craved more.
To exist in the physical plane, though, makes one a slave to the needs of the physical world -- not just sex but food, shelter, and sleep are all required. these were things the Succubus never had to worry about before, but the matters became all too pressing all too quickly (it's amazing how quickly a physical body craves a shower and a bit of respite on the toilet). To take care of these matters, in the end, required money. Money to buy food, money to rent shelter. Money.
Thankfully for the Succubus a job was just waiting for her -- a job at Dracula's castle. Seizing an opportunity when it's presented, the Succubus quickly joined up with Dracula's bad of merry minions (working title), and the rest has been history.
While many a succubi has worked for Dracula (you should see the horde that populates Carmilla's abode), the Succubus is a special case. Having joined of her own free will, the Succubus is a bit of a free agent, able to come and go as she pleases, when she pleases.
Part of this is by necessity -- the Succubus feeds on the dreams and desires of mortals, a sexy thought vampire that lurks late at night. While the creates that populate Dracula's castle may have dreams and desires, few provide the kind of sustenence the Succubus needs (and fewer still are desireable bu the Succubus, which is kind of arequirement for her).
And so she leaves when she wants, comes back when she wants... and when a battle looks like it's going to turn against her, more often than not the Succubus takes her leave -- she's a being of the dream world, and the dreams are just a quick step away whenever she wants.
The Reanimated Sorceress
The lands surrounding Dracula's Castle are a strange and wild place. Magic roams rampant, casting bursts and shocks as it moves (and occasionally feeding on lesser spells and hexes). This magic is often searching for a nexus, a way point to discharge itself. And it found it in the long dead body of Sypha Belnades.
Sypha, as you may remember, was one of three companions that aided Trevor Belmont in his attack on Dracula. She later married Trevor and helped to further the Belmont clan. She did die, eventually, and her corpse was laid to reset in the lands of Romania.
How she came back in open for debate. Some speculate that it was the dark sorcerer Shaft who brought her (along with zombified corpses of Trevor and Grant). Others think it was an accident, that Sypha somehow rose from the dead due to dark magical discharge and came back as an evil fiend (who then resurrected Trevor and Grant on her own). Still, some speculate it was a curse laid upon her before she died, possibly even by Dracula himself.
Now Sypha works for the Dark Lord, casting her own incantations to further his plans and aid the day when Dracula once again rules the world.
Not that she'd be upset leaving Dracula's Castle never to return. The dark magic that brought her back ties Sypha to the demon lord's lands. She works to find a way to free herself but so far she's been unsuccessful.
Not that she's all that helpful in Dracula's plans. Like so many of his minions, Sypha is only half-interested in helping the dark lord -- most of the time she's experimenting and conjuring, exploring the dark lands and their darker powers. She has an eternity as a zombie to look forward to, so she has plenty of time to work her dark gifts and learn the unspeakable arts.
She'll speak them, though. She is evil, after all.